Monday, May 30, 2011

So accidents do happen...

Insurance stresses me out. There is something about the whole idea that makes me think I am invincible. When it comes to personal safety, health, transport and anything else remotely sensible, I automatically decide that I am exempt.

Unfortunately, this belief is completely unfounded. I am uncommonly clumsy and have the luck of a blind black cat searching for the exit in a hall of mirrors with a machete. I reckon it’s probably just a combination of idiocy, laziness and an over-zealous God complex. Take my current situation for example; it’s been almost eight months that I have lived in France and I am still to sort out my social security. This means that if I have an accident or fall sick, financially I’m screwed. The French, unlike the good old state system of the UK, have no saving network for fools like me. A 10 minute GP consultation, even if it consists of ‘You’re fine, go away’, costs €23. If you have your social security card, you’re reimbursed. If not, you’re an idiot.

This is precisely the reason why I am grateful that my father has at least a few more brain cells than one quarter of his progeny. Take one foolish child, a foreign country, and a car and what do you get – all risks insurance. This was definitely money well spent. Case in point: last Tuesday, upon leaving the house to teach one of my private pupils, I had a rather unhappy encounter with another driver and am now intimately familiar with the small-print of the insurance contract. I am pleased to say that the accident was through no fault of my own – I was waiting to turn left at a junction about 150m from my house, when a slightly over-excited 18-year old came zooming round a bend and crashed into my side. Unfortunately, being in a Toyata Rav 4, his ride fared a little better than my little yoghurt pot, which now has un-closable doors. Yet then again, Chevy-the-Chevrolet (for it is he) held out pretty well and thankfully neither I nor the other driver were hurt.

I won’t go into details about the extent of the damage, nor the lengthy and rather painful bureaucratic process that has followed, but it is safe to say that this has been an experience that I am unlikely to forget. I am eternally grateful to Nadine and the Perusins (my surrogate family) who have seen a lot of tears, dealt with a lot of impatient insurance personnel, and have generally been great support. In all honesty, without them, I would undoubtedly still be at the site of the accident babbling in garbled French and squinting blankly at the ‘Constat d’Accident’ forms.

The driver side - the door handle has been taken clean off.
Rav 4 brake marks on the road
Relatively little damage for my compadre - although he can no longer open the driver door.
Pretty undrivable, unless you enjoy a lot of fresh air...
What happens now? I am without a car and have been for the last 2 weeks. The ‘experts’ are coming to the house on the 6th June (apparently they’re ‘really busy’...) and will take wee Chevy away for some TLC and (fingers crossed) lend me another car in the meantime. For now, I’m relying on the kindness of others, the patience of Nadine, and an old broken bike to get around. Although definitely not perfect, it’s pretty funny...


Monday, May 16, 2011

No hablo español, soy escocía.

Sevilla, Cádiz and Córdoba.  

Disclaimer: Much as I would love to claim ownership, I take no responsibility for the images included in this post. Accreditations and thanks go to travel companion and fellow mentalist Miss Georgie Raggett, whose phenomenal photography skills do this trip far more justice than any of my words could.

There are some cities with which you instantly fall in love, and it’s hard not to leave Seville without vowing that you will return. The red-hot heart of Andalucia, the city itself is a breathtaking assault on the senses – a fantastically passionate melting pot of music, ambiance, architecture, tourists, tapas, and flamenco. Apparently, Byron once remarked that Seville was a “pleasant city, famous for its oranges and women”. This seemingly placid observation in fact entirely embodies the Andalucían charm and heat-induced hedonism of this southern city, where the art of enjoyment has been thoroughly tried, tested and perfected. Fairytale orange trees line the streets, and blanched pink, yellow and almond buildings give way to labyrinths of narrow lanes peppered with miniature churches, tapas bars and hidden plazas. Witnessing the passage of various civilizations, a unique mix of Roman, Islamic, Gothic and Renaissance influences are all very much in evidence; co-existing in a bizarre yet fantastically coherent fashion.

The amalgam of cultures is most obvious at the Catedral de Santa María de la Sede a catholic edifice built on the former site of the city’s most following the Spanish ‘Reconquista’. [See notes on Cordoba below]. Although it is most definitely a fully-functioning cathedral – Altar? Check. Huge nave? Check. Hellalotta gold? Check - it has retained some elements from mosque, including the famous Giralda, a minaret-cum-bell tower. This is economising at its finest. 









For more of the Moorish-Spanish melange, check out the Jardines Reales Alcázares just opposite the cathedral or, for a more recent mixture, head south to the crazily diverse and extraordinarily lavish Plaza de España.






WARNING: these areas are extremely touristique. What's more, it’s hard not to become a little jaded with the inevitable juxtapositions that come with a top tourist spot. For example, snap-happy holiday-makers waddle towards the nearest horse and cart rides whilst shooing away the hoards of gyspy women proffering sprigs of rosemary in a promise to read your palm. The fantastic juxtapositions found in the town centre are in fact a microcosmic representation of Seville’s relationship with its surroundings, as the gaiety and wealth of the city exist in stark contrast to the economically depressed agricultural countryside in Andalucía.

Back to the city centre and a web of pedestrianized streets lead to the Plaza Nueva, the heart of Seville’s main shopping and commercial district. Smartly dressed and immaculately coiffed senoras sit yards away from topless tramps taking cerveza-induced siestas. In nearby Plaza de la Encarnación, it is hard not to miss the enormous yet rather incongruous Metropole Parasol – a match-stick-esque structure completed earlier this year by German architect Jurgen Mayer, and housing the central market and, bizarrely, an underground archaeological complex. Random.

A five-minute’ walk along the Calle Sierpes will take you to the Plaza de Jesús de la Pasión, another enormously busy yet spectacularly Spanish hotspot. Around lunchtime you’ll find hundreds of people milling around here; picking at ceramic plates of tapas, sipping at tumblers of cerveza and indulging in cones of crisps from weathered street vendors. With the roar of sound greeting you well before you arrive and the scent of incense and the midday sun clinging to your clothes well after you depart... this is not to be missed.

In terms of accommodation, there is more than enough to choose from, although look out as lodgings become sparse during the two major Sevillian festivals – Semana Santa (Holy Week) and the week-long Feria de Abril – wherein visitors flock to the city all corners of the globe. Due to some fortuitous planning, I was lucky enough to catch Palm Sunday and the opening of Semana Santa. Unlike anything I have ever witnessed, the festival consists of myriad processions of brotherhoods, all adorned in Nazareno robes and cone-shaped Capirote (as now unfortunately adopted by the Ku-Klux Klan) through the city streets, carrying enormous floats depicting 17th-century images of the Virgin or Christ. Although strictly speaking this is a religious affair, there is a lot of merry-making for all ages, and bars are packed day and night with gorgeously smartly-dressed families.





It is hard to go hungry in Seville, and it would be sacrilegious not to make the most out of the city’s multitudinous eateries. For a casual midday munch, head to the city centre or to Calle Alfafa for some seriously good outdoor tapas. Across the river, the Calle Betis is renowned for its strip of bars and restaurants; a perfect place to unwind and watch the sun go down over the river.






In terms of nightlife, Seville is renowned for its relaxed, fun-loving nature and, due to the abundance of tourists security on the streets is the least of your worries. For those with shallow pockets, grab a bottle of Estrella and head to the riverbank, where hoards of Spanish under-agers drink and flirt in the reflected light of the moon. For something a little more stylish, head to Calle de los Alemanes, where you will find yourself spoilt for choice with bars and disco’s a-plenty. As the flamenco capital of Andalucía, it is imperative that you try your hardest to catch some live dancing – for the best advice, steer clear of the heavily overpriced tourist trail and ask your nearest local on the top spots for some highly impassioned and truly authentic Spanish performances.
                                                                                     
A mere two-hour bus ride away, spending a lazy afternoon on the beach at Cádiz is another no-brainer. To enhance the experience, head into the elegant old town centre for the evening; indulging in a casual tapas and tinto with the scent of sea salt still clinging to your clothes.






Likewise, Córdoba is easily accessible, whether by bus or train, and is also home to the remarkable Catedrale de Cordoba. Echoing the mosque-cum-cathedral of Seville, the site started out as a pagan temple, then became a Visigothic Christian Church, then the Umayyad Moors converted the building into a mosque, then following the Reconquista, it was transformed once again into a Roman Catholic cathedral. A mind-boggling mix of Moorish architecture and Christian edifices, you find yourself seemingly walking from one religion to another – an experience that really forces you to appreciate the beauty of both.  








Passion and prayer, flamboyancy and faith; Sevilla, tienes mi corazón.